The ease with which we remove ourselves from the turmoil of the world and the disfunction of our country (any country for that matter), is quite astounding. Cynicism and apathy are not alone in contributing to this sad reality. Our identity, the one mechanically given when we enter the world—given to us without our request or awareness—is another factor to consider.
I am a “citizen” of the United States, my parent country. I was born into it and taught the important lessons, like what this country is, what we do, and why we do it. I learned, like all good Americans, that we provide protection for those who cannot protect themselves, guidance for those who have not yet found their way, answers for those who have questions, and the rule of law for those who are unsure of who is in charge. We came about through the slow evolution of empire, building upon all that came before us to be bigger, better, and stronger than all else. I, like most children, swelled with pride learning these things.
As a child, how do object to what you are told when you have no reference? It is similar to idolizing your father without really knowing anything about him, besides that he is yours. He could be mean spirited, selfish, and bigoted, but he is what you have and what you know. Our home, our country, our identity is no different. We are inculcated with a sense of pride and compelled to swear allegiance to our home before we can even begin to ask the question: does our country, our home, deserve such blanket honor and blind fealty. Does any country for that matter? How can you honor and respect anything without intimately knowing what it is you are pledging yourself to?
How do you argue with such power, influence, greatness, and magnanimity? I feel silly even objecting to it now, despite dedicating years of thought to this topic. It’s strange how feelings of guilt can creep in even when you are battling something you believe is wrong. That is powerful indoctrination. What do I know? And how arrogant of me to think things could be better given the distinguished minds which collaborated in crafting the system, the sacrifices that went into maintaining it, and the good that has come about from it. How ignorant of me to imagine a world—where the events I see I would describe as unjust, inequitable, inhumane, and so many other unflattering words—better than the one I currently find myself. How selfish of me to want to take all this benevolence, humanity, and emancipation away from the world, and replace it with benevolence, humanity, and emancipation.
I was told that I am free, but I do not feel free. I have been taught and compelled to blindly, obediently, and exuberantly embrace the above “patriotic” statements and stances, but I struggle to go along with them willfully. Am I to assume then that I am ungrateful of all that I have? Am I unpatriotic because my definition of patriotism differs from what I have been told? No doubt I am undeserving of the freedoms I was born with because I question the authority that granted them to me.
I have freedoms, yes, but does that make me free? If I extend the leash of a dog so they can travel a few feet further, does that mean the dog is free? They are free to travel further than they had previously, but they are not free. We are that dog on the leash. Our taste of natural freedom was quickly taken from us soon after we took our first breath. From that moment we were engulfed in an artificial freedom, a state freedom, a freedom not of our choosing, but one decided for us. The flag was firmly planted in the soil of our DNA. The shackles were clasped on us as we laid in the hospital bed. These shackles are not a natural fixture accompanying life but a brand bearing the crest of our owners notifying us of our place. Sorry to be so dramatic, but I’m attempting to match the theatrics behind our compulsory patriotism.
Having freedom does not necessarily make you free. We live in a hard glass bubble of freedom. It is defined by and exists within the boundaries of that bubble; boundaries demarcated and defined for us. Freedom is something quite different than having freedoms. To be free is to have a choice. We are given choices, but not the relevant ones. We are given freedoms, but not freedom. I am not free to disassociate myself with my country. Nor is anyone else. To quote Rousseau, “Man is born free and everywhere he is in chains.” How true, and how sad. We can attempt to flee our false freedom, but in the process, we run from one master to another. Control lurks around all corners, and we have no choice in the end but to embrace it—even if that embrace is a begrudging one. As of now, we are all puppies on a short leash waiting for food to be put in our dishes. Our master holds tight to that leash and is very diligent at making sure it doesn’t extend too far.
I was told this is the greatest country on earth, though I do not remember being asked what great means to me or told what great means to those who made this determination. I was told it was the beacon and protector of democracy. Yet, I feel my voice muffled in a sea of silence. And is the democracy they speak of the democracy I think of? I was told that everything we do in the world is for the betterment of it, even when those things are dark or ugly. Yet, many of our past and current actions say otherwise. I look around and am stifled by the horrors I see and hear about, and I can only imagine the ones I am unaware of. Will tomorrow be any different? I can think of no reason to imprudently trust the actions of others, even if they claim to be doing so for the greater good. I can think of numerous historical actions made under this premise with horrendous and heinous outcomes. Lastly, I am told that I should be thankful for my privilege, but I am too dumbfounded to be thankful.
How can I be thankful that I have something when I know there are so many others out there with nothing? How can I be thankful for any of this when what I should be thankful for contributes to much of the harm I see around the world? How can I be thankful when day after day, and year after year, I see the world continue down its path of stagnation? How can I be thankful when this great country of mine ignores the voices coming from below? How can I be grateful when I define greatness in a far different sense than the common designation? Make no mistake! I reference my country, but I can just as easily broaden the accusations.
What I am thankful for is my awareness. I am aware that the world has serious problems that are being treated secondary to the luxuries of the few. I am aware that this idolized image of the American empire is more important to some than holding the mirror up to their face and seeing what they have become. I am thankful that I cannot acquiesce. We should not accept blind faith in human creations. We should embrace the nagging questions that cause discomfort and lead to improvement. I will always embrace this discomfort and resist the strong temptations of basking in my privilege.
We should resist and question and demand improvement, but this is not what we do. We are far more likely to echo the incantations fed to us as children, then forcefully embrace and fight for them as adults. I do not recall one instance growing up where I was encouraged to describe the world that I wanted to live in, unless it was a fanciful conversation. I do not recall anyone ever asking me to point out the flaws of this great country. I do not recall the powers that be looking down on the meek to inquire about their thoughts, values, insights, or opinions. I do not recall, because they did not happen. That is not the way the world works. That is not the way power and control work.
We have not created a nation or world of independent thinkers seeking improvement and challenging each other. We have created herds of sycophants. They are gladiators fighting for the entertainment of the audience and the pleasure of the emperor. Does this sound like freedom to you? We are free to live by the rules set down for us. We are free to choose from the options provided to us. We are free to do whatever we want, so long as it is not something that will disrupt the status quo and the power base.
I am exhausted from all the freedom. It is no wonder good has such a hard time making its way in the world. It would seem that freedom stands in its way much of the time.
I am thankful for your awareness as well, and for your abundant kindness in writing it too
Viva la 🇵🇸